Tara Zandra dot Com

[Previous entry: "darth tater"] [Main Index] [Next entry: "up and down"]

03/16/2005 Archived Entry: "rest in peace"

My grandmother passed away on Saturday. It was rather unexpected and I'm still in a bit of shock over it. We had the services today and they were very lovely. So much of my family was there and though I abhor the reason we were all together, it always makes me happy when so many of us can gather in one place. We're a large family and spread out quite a bit, so family gatherings are few and far between. My mom and her siblings each got up and said something about their mother and one cousin of mine did as well. I chose not to as I really didn't think I would be able to say more than one sentence before breaking down in tears. The reason I am having such a hard time coming to terms with all this is because she didn't get to meet her youngest great-grandchild, my Daisy. Family was so important to her and I know how much it would have meant to her to see the newest addition to our family. Daisy makes the seventh great-grandchild. I am so sadden that all she had were pictures. We were planning on visiting just two weeks ago, but by then, she was in the hospital.
But if I had spoken at the service, I would have said that I have two sets of memories of my grandmother. The first ones were when I was very young. She basically taught me to read before I ever set foot in a school. I remember taking turns with her reading Little House in the Big Woods while sitting on her red sofa. I remember sitting at the piano with her teaching me scales, not that I ever progressed beyond that. I remember the summer that she had me take swimming lessons at the pool in their mobile home community. The thing about these memories, is they are similar to memories shared by her children. Swimming lessons, piano lessons and Little House on the Prairie were all mentioned by at least one person. I feel I shared a piece of my mother's childhood.
My grandparents moved away when I was around 7, and though we visited, it wasn't the same as when they lived nearby. But about 12 years ago, they moved back to the state, and that is where my second set of memories begins. I love that the most my grandmother could accomplish in the kitchen was making toast, yet the woman embraced the internet and used it like a professional. Every week she sent out an email detailing all the family news. It was a way to keep us all in touch despite the miles between us. This past Sunday it hit me that it is to be no more. In the past few years I've seen my grandmother take on the role of Great-Grandmother as I've watched her read to my child as she used to read to me. She also thoroughly enjoyed listening to Tabitha progress in her reading and encouraged her by sending her wonderful books as gifts. I too received books as gifts when I was a child, but my grandmother enjoyed technology and in the more recent past she started sending me DVDs. But books were always her passion. I never had the need to go to the library because she was involved in so many book clubs and when she would finish a book, it would be sent to my mother who then sent it to me to enjoy. She introduced me to many writers and I always looked to her recommendation for mystery writers.
I also associate pictures with my grandmother. She loved pictures of her family and had them up all over her house. I'm absolutely horrible about sending out pictures to people, but the internet saved me as she was just as happy to receive them in email form so I tried my best to keep her well supplied.
Anyway, I could go on for days but it all amounts to the same thing. I cherish my memories and am grateful she had such a wonderful relationship with Tabitha whom she always referred to as "such a loving thing." She will be greatly missed.

Replies: 10 comments

Zandra,

So sorry to hear this.:( You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Posted by Janene @ 03/22/2005 02:36 PM PST

Zandra,
So sorry to hear about your grandmother. I really enjoyed reading about her. Very touching. It sounds like she had a very loving relationship with her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren.

Posted by Jill @ 03/20/2005 03:53 PM PST

I too, am sorry to hear your grandmother has passed. Family is important and I am always sorry to hear of anyone losing a family member. :(

Posted by Christen @ 03/18/2005 10:44 AM PST

Tara,
I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing some of your memories of her. She sounds like an incredible woman and although she's no longer phisically here, your memories of her lives and thrives in your heart and mind. Share them with your little ones and she'll live in their hearts too.

Posted by Emelyn @ 03/18/2005 10:21 AM PST

(((Zandra))) I am so sorry to hear about your grandmother's passing. Hugs sweetie. I am thinking of you.

Posted by Mandi @ 03/17/2005 01:38 PM PST

My condolences to you and your family, Zandra. Your grandmother sounds like an incredible woman.

Posted by Cortney @ 03/17/2005 10:27 AM PST

I'm so sorry to hear this news. You have some very fond memories of her to hold in your heart.

Posted by Susan @ 03/17/2005 07:53 AM PST

Sorry to hear about your grandmother, Zandra. She does sound like a great influence in your life. Don't feel bad that she didn't see Daisy before she passed, I'm sure she is smiling down on her now.

Posted by Suzanne @ 03/17/2005 07:12 AM PST

I am truly sorry for your loss. Your grandmother sounds like she was an incredible woman.. Thanks for sharing what you did about her.. It made me feel blessed to feel your love for your grandmother ((hugs))

Posted by Valerie @ 03/16/2005 09:36 PM PST

So sorry for your loss. She sounds like a wonderful woman! I know you will miss her!

Posted by Dena @ 03/16/2005 09:00 PM PST

Powered By Greymatter